Soeben bei pilots.de gesehen: beeing an airline pilot

[munich]

Von: Carmine Bevilacqua

Datum:

Dienstag, 13. Januar 2004 18:01:56

 

Here is a home study simulator course for those who still hunger for the

romance and adventure of airline flying. It will all come back to you if

you practice the following at home:

 

Stay out of bed all night.

 

Sit in your most uncomfortable chair, in a closet, for nine or ten hours

facing a four foot wide panoramic photo of a flight deck.

 

Have two or three noisy vacuum cleaners on high, out of sight but within

hearing distance and operating throughout the night. If a vacuum cleaner

fails, do the appropriate restart checklist.

 

Halfway through your nocturnal simulator course, arrange for a bright

spotlight to shine directly into your face for two or three hours,

simulating an eastbound flight into the sunrise.

 

Have bland overcooked food served on a tray midway through the night.

 

Have cold cups of coffee delivered from time to time. Ask your spouse to

slam the door frequently.

 

At the time when you must heed nature's call, force yourself to stand

outside the bathroom door for at least ten minutes, transferring your

weight from leg to leg, easing the discomfort. Don't forget to wear your

hat.

 

Leave the closet after the prescribed nine or ten hours, turn on your

sprinklers and stand out in the cold and "rain" for twenty minutes,

simulating the wait for the crew car.

 

Head for your bedroom, wet and with your suitcase and flight bag. Stand

outside the door till your wife gets up and leaves, simulating the wait

you'd have while the maid makes up the hotel room.

 

When your spouse inquires, "Just what in the hell have you been doing?"

just say, "Recalling the allure of all night flying to romantic places"

and collapse into bed.

 

If you are a purist, do this two nights in a row.

 

Gruss,

Carmine Bevilacqua

 

 

Also schmeißt Euere MS-FS weg!!!:D :D :D